This first month of summer has flown past. I was honestly worried about how it would be having Porter home all day long. It has been much better than anticipated. Him being an avid reader has definitely helped. If he has down time, he reads or listens to books and he'll actually do it for hours. He wants to listen to a book or read a book as we're driving, etc. Sometimes he reads so much I actually have to tell him to put it down and talk to us. Also, he has spent time playing with the boys more than I thought he would. They don't play all the time and there are still fights, but I have found him and Jonas playing and keeping each other company. This a huge blessing. I want them to be friends, not just brothers. Learning to enjoy each others company is so important. It's been helpful that Jonas' good friend Ollie has not been around much and neither have Porter's friends. Chase Wible moved a week ago and Harvey has been out of town on/off. He still has Tanner, but they don't play every day.
June flew past. We took the boys fishing during a free event at Fairmont Park. The boys all enjoyed it and ended up with new fishing rods. No one caught anything, but at least they had fun. We've enjoyed swimming at Ashley's pool and Gayle's pool. Jonas started up swim lessons again too. He is getting more and more comfortable in the water which is great.
We had the Neighborhood BBQ and I don't think I saw Porter the entire time. He usually takes off once he sees friends and we don't hear from him again until it's time to go home. Jonas and Mason stick close by. Jonas and Mason both rode in the bike parade. Actually, Mason rode and Jonas ran. It was pretty funny to watch.
David and I attended the open house for the Snowpine Lodge up at Alta. I was afraid I was a little under dressed because I was wearing jeans, but as we walked in, David told me I was in good company. Mitt Romney was also wearing jeans. We were sure we'd know many people at the party, but we ended up knowing a few people from the stake and Ashley and Mason Schmutz were there.
We hit up the park and splash pad at Liberty Park with friends and the boys played for hours. We had brought Ollie and Tanner along and then met Maria and her kids. I love when the boys just play and play for hours outside. It is so good for their little bodies to run and play.
I've spent many mornings/afternoons/evenings sitting in a lawn chair in the front yard as the boys play. Under the trees in our yard, the heat is bearable and it is so refreshing to enjoy the outdoors. Unfortunately I'm not the best playdate right now since I'm tired and big, but when they pause to snuggle me and read books or eat their popsicles, it is heaven on earth.
We took the boys on a trip to AZ to visit David's family. We stayed at a hotel nearby. On Monday, we swam and then we were able to take his parents out to dinner for their birthdays. On Tuesday, I took the boys to the Bass Pro Shop to explore while David took care of some drama with his brother Randall. We took the boys, Lillian and Matt and Jackson and Cassie to Urban Jungle. It's a trampoline/obstacle course place. Everyone had fun playing for 1 1/2 hours. It was the perfect place to get energy out, besides swimming, when it was so hot outside. Later in the afternoon his parents had everyone over for a BBQ and we swam. Grandpa rented a motorcycle for the kids to ride on too. Porter was the only one of our kids that took him up on a ride. I'm not surprised Jonas didn't go, but I thought maybe Mason would sit on it. But, for some reason he didn't want to. Maybe the loud noise scared him.
Wednesday, we spent the day having lunch with my friend Laurie and swimming with her kids. It was great to catch up with her and of course Porter loved having some older kids to play with. We had dinner at David's parents and then headed back to the hotel to get ready to fly out tomorrow.
The trip was really overwhelming for David. There is a lot of dysfunction in his family and unfortunately his parent's home is not the greatest place to be. His brothers come and go as they please and they are all dealing with major issues. David's mom kept telling Porter he should come back and stay with them by himself, but that will never happen. She had just previously told me all the things going on with his brother and what is brought into their home and it is no place I would have Porter be. There is no way his parents would be able to take care of him and deal with David's siblings. Plus, I feel like Porter would end up watching a ton of tv and playing a lot of video games if he was there. They just don't have the energy to take care of him and the environment is not a healthy, safe environment. It's really sad. I'm pretty sure we won't head back to AZ for a long time.
When we got back in town, David was already feeling better just to be home. He had one night off before he headed up to Girl's Camp. He took Jonas and Porter with him. Once again Porter was right in the mix and Jonas hung back. Jonas said, "Why do all these people have to be here?" Porter is our extrovert and Jonas is our introvert.
Mason and I had some special time at home. We met Ashley at City Creek for a bit and it was fun to play with him alone. He skipped as we walked. There was one incident where he got really embarassed and wanted to go home. I've never seen him get embarassed like that. He accidentally grabbed some other woman's hand bag. After it happened, he buried his head in his hands and cried and just kept saying, "I want to go home."
We had a going away party for Josh and Heidi Wible. We are so sad that they moved. They are such an incredible family and we have loved having their little boys around. Jacob, Chase and Connor will be greatly missed. The BBQ was a blast and our boys got to stay up until 10pm!
We got to attend another going away party for Celeste and Rich Davis, but this one was a Murder Mystery Party. David was Mr. "Ollie" Oliver and I was Ms. Lavender. It was fun to get dressed up and go even though I am such a terrible actress. David did a great job getting into character. He was a little bit nervous and he was always stroking other men's faces because his character could not grow facial hair. It was brilliant. He even won two prices for how he played the game. I was a shy, depressed school teacher. You'd think I could pull that character off easily, but I just kept laughing at everyone else as they got into character. Some people play their parts brilliantly.
The 4th of July was fun this year. We spent the morning/early afternoon at a carnival at Fitts Park in South Salt Lake. There were bounce houses, train rides, face painting and balloon making. Plus the boys were able to practice some "wood" chopping karate skills. Afterwards we enjoyed slushees. You'd think we'd hit the jackpot. In the afternoon we visited Gayle and then we spent the evening outside with Ashley.
Friday (7/5/19), the boys and I met Ashley, her friend Isabel and Isabel's family at Pineview Reservoir. The boys swam, paddleboarded, played in the sand and ate. I'm so glad that Ashley invited us up there to enjoy the cool water and playing hard.
Before I forget, I wanted to record something that happened with Porter. The boys all picked out popsicles to eat earlier this week. Unfortunately there was only one blue one left and both Porter and Jonas wanted it. Jonas was crying about it and Porter was so mad. I was extremely frustrated watching them fight over them. I told them that they could split it or I was going to throw the popsicles away if no one was willing to give it up. So, it got to the point where I threw them away. Porter went into the trash can and got it out. He was holding it and Jonas was still crying. Porter offered to split it with Jonas, but Jonas said he only wanted to the whole thing. Finally, even though Porter did not want to, on his own he gave the popsicle to Jonas. Then he sad down next to me and cried. Not a mad cry, but a sad cry. I told him how proud I was of his choice. Then as Jonas watched Porter crying, Jonas started crying because he didn't want Porter to be sad. He offered to split the popsicle with Porter. It was one of the sweetest moments. Porter said he could have it all and he went and got a different color. I know that was hard for Porter. David talked with him about sometimes even when do the right thing, we might still be sad because we gave up something we wanted. Porter is growing up and I need to remember this.
I realize I am extremely hard on my kids. I am always telling them what to do or getting frustrated with them. Today I had a difficult time with them and I wanted to cry. Then I read something about how I need to and can change. What I read were specific things I can change in how I communicate with them that should help the exact behaviors I am struggling with. Now, I have to get myself to change. They deserve so much better than I give them. I often feel like I am screwing them up and I want them to know that they are incredible boys and that I love them.
